Body Image and Reaching Self Acceptance – What it looked like for me.

Most of this was written in 2017. I have made some changes and updated the end of it 🙂 Enjoy!

Today, On world kindness day, I’d like to talk a little bit about body image and self acceptance. Yes, it’s very important to be kind to one another but most importantly we be kind to ourselves. It was only when I reached this point and viewing myself in the highest light possible that I could start releasing the physical weight.

What does it mean to really accept oneself? How do we get to this place of true self acceptance and happiness – no matter what our outer shell looks like. Did you know that your negative self talk can actually affect other people and bring them down? Coming from someone who has struggled with disordered eating and disordered thought processes for many, many years….I hope you know that you can trust what I’m about to tell you!

This has been a true lifelong struggle of mine. Despite reaching my highest weight of 265 in 2017 I still felt OK (albeit a little too comfortable in that position).

I accepted myself despite the facts. I had hated myself for so many years before that and I was weary and tired. It always felt like a sense of dread and self loathing in my own skin. For many years – I couldn’t even look at myself in a mirror.  I used to be so down on myself and negative…it really affected my life and relationships. I wasted SO MANY YEARS!!! I wouldn’t buy myself new outfits – I’d wear the same thing day after day. I found joy in nothing. I was stuck in shitty friendships where I let people take advantage of me and just put up with the SHIT. I would stay in bed ALOT and not leave the house. I had developed a pretty nasty binge eating disorder.

  I am writing this so that you don’t do the same. It’s imperative that we change our thoughts – it will change our life. And nothing can change…I repeat NOTHING – if you do not change the way you think. It takes time. For me it took years. For me over 25 years. And sometimes the thoughts revert back…but I don’t let them float around in my head for very long. I observe them, see what they might mean and then let them go.

Something has slowly shifted in my thought process over the past two years. It actually really bothers me now when I hear in person or read online negative self talk (i.e girls/guys talking about “fat” they are or other people fat shaming people”) It makes me sad and brings me back to all those years I wasted being caught up in the negative self talk and chaotic thought process that goes along with that. All that time I wasted in suffering mode rather than making conscious change to do something positive about it.

Lets get real…Ok – I have FAT still (a lot of it) I have cellulite, I have stretch marks – these are all just facts for the moment. They are fluid facts…they will change and have started to change since last year (sometimes completely) and improve over time. These current facts do not describe me fully as a human being. I have learned to not let it affect me. I find joy in shopping now even if it’s at plus sized stores (who cares?) I find clothing that fits my body how it is now. I thought my plus size wedding dress fit me perfectly and I wore the hell out of it! I did not starve myself just because my wedding day was down the road. Just because I accept myself now fully for what I am, does not mean I want to stay here nor does it mean that I am a stagnant rock, not wanting to improve my outer shell. No…I do want to  continually make improvements – but for my own sanity and for the sanity of those around me I had to switch my thought process – I had to shed the negativity which filled me with chaos and depression for many years. I don’t allow these things to stress me out anymore and dictate how my days will be. I could not function that way. I had to let it go.

And it was a struggle…and I got it wrong…and I had to work HARD at it. And it’s still a struggle and it’s something I’m going to have to continue to work on. But it was possible. Little by little I started feeling better. I got happier, I felt better in the morning, I found joy in that plus size outfit I was rocking…I found joy in putting on some makeup, made positive life changes, dropped negative relationships and surrounded myself with positive people. Along with that I tried my best to drop the negative self talk. Things moved fast for me. I met the most amazing man who supported and uplifted me, some negative relationships had to fall away, I left a job where I was forced to continually work with a negative co-worker, got engaged, moved in with my man, got married.  I found new passions and talents. And I attribute all of these amazing positive life changes to deciding to accept myself fully no matter what that looked like for me from day to day. I know you can do this too and if you are struggling, feel free to drop me a line – I can lend an ear and see if I can shed some light and perhaps some hope. 

It is now November of 2019. Since writing this (above) in 2017 I have lost over 40 pounds, I am able to walk long distances with my dog every day, my BMI has dropped by over 8 points, I have changed the way I eat and my relationship with food has improved. I have enrolled in a holistic nutrition program in the hopes of helping others some day.

You can rewire yourself and shift your reality! You don’t need to be in the same place this time, next year.

Be kind to yourself today and every day <3

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Medical Medium Recipe Challenge – October 26 – Thyme water

Medical Medium October Recipe Challenge Day 26 💖


It’s always a good time to get hydrated and I have lots of fresh Thyme on hand so I chose thyme Water for today.

Just fill up a pitcher, jug or tall glass with filtered water, add your thyme and let steep for a few hours or over night. It then needs to be strained and you may add some fresh squeezed lemon and/or raw honey.

This is great for naturally killing/lowering unproductive bacteria in the body.

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Ingredients: Water, thyme

Thyme: According to Medical Medium “Thyme has a powerful ability to kill off bacteria and viruses and should be taken at first signs of a cold or illness. It is a rich source of several essential vitamins such as vitamins A, E, C, K, B-complex and folate and it is also one of the best sources of calcium, iron, manganese, selenium, and potassium. Thyme contains antiseptic, antiviral, antibacterial, carminative, diaphoretic, and expectorant properties which supports healing throughout the entire body. 

Thyme is vital to help stimulate memory, prevent nightmares and melancholy, ease headache and muscle tension, soothe coughs, relieve fevers, and fight colds and infections. It also contains a compound called carvacrol which is an excellent natural tranquilizer and has a tonic effect on the entire nervous system. Thyme is a good source of pyridoxine which is known to play an important role in manufacturing GABA levels in the brain, aid in regulating sleep patterns, and benefit neurotransmitter function in the brain. GABA is also one of the best natural defenses against stress damage. 

Thyme is a great purifying herb for the digestive tract and has been found to destroy certain intestinal hookworms and roundworms and aid in the digestion of rich or fatty foods. Thyme has some of the highest antioxidant levels among herbs. It is packed with bioflavonoids such as lutein, zeaxanthin, and naringenin which have all been shown to have powerful effects on eliminating free-radicals and other disease producing substances from the body. 

Thyme oil has been used as a local antiseptic and antimicrobial since ancient times and is highly beneficial in supporting the immune system and for easing fatigue and weakness after illness. Thyme oil can also help to stop hair loss by improving blood flow to the scalp and feeding the roots of the hair. Consider using more fresh thyme in your food by adding it to soups, salads, guacamole, vegetables, potatoes, rice, etc… Fresh thyme also makes a powerful and very healing tea. Steep a handful of fresh sprigs in hot water for at least 10 minutes or it can be soaked overnight in a pitcher of water and sipped throughout the day. Add honey or lemon, if desired.

Three cheers for good health! 10 out of 10 for simplicity.

Medical Medium Recipe Challenge – October 25 – Thyme Tea

This has been another yard work weekend so I have been all about the simple Medical Medium Recipes. Plus while at the grocery store I picked up this really nice looking “Jamaican style thyme” and so I am trying to utilize this as much as I can 🙂

This brings me to Day 25 of my Medical Medium Recipe Challenge. A very simple one! Thyme Tea. So beneficial to the body. 10 out of 10 for simplicity.

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Ingredients: Thyme, Lemons (raw honey optional) and water

Thyme: According to Medical Medium “Thyme has a powerful ability to kill off bacteria and viruses and should be taken at first signs of a cold or illness. It is a rich source of several essential vitamins such as vitamins A, E, C, K, B-complex and folate and it is also one of the best sources of calcium, iron, manganese, selenium, and potassium. Thyme contains antiseptic, antiviral, antibacterial, carminative, diaphoretic, and expectorant properties which supports healing throughout the entire body. 

Thyme is vital to help stimulate memory, prevent nightmares and melancholy, ease headache and muscle tension, soothe coughs, relieve fevers, and fight colds and infections. It also contains a compound called carvacrol which is an excellent natural tranquilizer and has a tonic effect on the entire nervous system. Thyme is a good source of pyridoxine which is known to play an important role in manufacturing GABA levels in the brain, aid in regulating sleep patterns, and benefit neurotransmitter function in the brain. GABA is also one of the best natural defenses against stress damage. 

Thyme is a great purifying herb for the digestive tract and has been found to destroy certain intestinal hookworms and roundworms and aid in the digestion of rich or fatty foods. Thyme has some of the highest antioxidant levels among herbs. It is packed with bioflavonoids such as lutein, zeaxanthin, and naringenin which have all been shown to have powerful effects on eliminating free-radicals and other disease producing substances from the body. 

Thyme oil has been used as a local antiseptic and antimicrobial since ancient times and is highly beneficial in supporting the immune system and for easing fatigue and weakness after illness. Thyme oil can also help to stop hair loss by improving blood flow to the scalp and feeding the roots of the hair. Consider using more fresh thyme in your food by adding it to soups, salads, guacamole, vegetables, potatoes, rice, etc… Fresh thyme also makes a powerful and very healing tea. Steep a handful of fresh sprigs in hot water for at least 10 minutes or it can be soaked overnight in a pitcher of water and sipped throughout the day. Add honey or lemon, if desired.

Lemons: Lemons are a powerful healing fruit containing anti septic, antibiotic and anti-cancer properties. They are rich in vitamin C and B complex minerals. They can help cleanse and detoxify your entire body! It’s a good idea to start your day with a tall glass of fresh lemon juice.

Add some fresh thyme to your water today for lots of extra healing benefits.

Medical Medium Recipe Challenge – October 19 – Chili Loaded Baked Potatoes

Today my husband and I spent most of our day doing yard work. This involved raking a massive yard, picking up 1000s and 1000s (literally) of black walnuts, filling the back of the truck with said leaves and walnuts, rinse and repeat. We both were so tired and needed a hearty but healthy dinner after all of that!

Make way for Medical Medium October Recipe Challenge Day 19 – Chili Loaded Baked potatoes.

The chili is loaded with so many different kinds of veggies – it’s delicious and nourishing.

I added a little bit of dill to his cashew sour cream recipe which is why it looks a little different 🙂 This made enough to have left overs for two more days most likely!

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Anthony Williams (Medical Medium) feels strongly about the healing powers of the potato! Here’s what he has to say:

” One common misconception is that potatoes are poisonous because they’re nightshades. Potatoes, tomatoes, eggplants, and other edible nightshades do not aggravate conditions such as arthritis; you can put aside the worry that potatoes are inflammatory. (For more on this, see the chapter “Harmful Health Fads and Trends.”) Truth is, the toxic oil that potatoes are fried in, the cheese sauce ladled on top, and the butter, milk, and cream mashed in are what have the world convinced that potatoes are bad for us. The frying process and the highfat/high-sugar content of dairy products are the real instigators of insulin resistance and A1C levels that reach the diabetic zone. This combination of fat plus lactose also feeds every type of cancer. Potatoes don’t cause health issues; the other ingredients served with them do. We should also be careful not to lump potatoes in with the fear of grains and processed foods.

If you’re avoiding “white” foods such as white rice, white flour, white sugar, and dairy products (such as milk, cheese, yogurt, and cream), don’t cut out potatoes! After all, a potato in its whole, natural state isn’t white—it’s covered in nutrient-rich red, brown, gold, blue, or purple skin. This skin of the potato is one of the best nutrition sources on the planet—it’s a miracle of amino acids, proteins, and phytochemicals. Only once you cut into a potato might you see a white interior—which doesn’t mean it’s lacking in value. After all, we don’t think of apples, onions, or radishes as white and therefore useless, even though when you cut into them, they’re devoid of color. And a cultivated blueberry is colorless inside (whereas wild blueberries are saturated with color inside and out); this doesn’t mean it shows up on white food lists. Instead, we picture these foods in their whole forms, which is exactly how we need to start thinking of potatoes.

The entire potato, inside and out, is valuable and beneficial for your health: potato plants draw some of the highest concentration of macro and trace minerals from the earth. Potatoes are also high in potassium and rich in vitamin B6, as well as a fantastic source of amino acids, especially lysine in its bioactive form. Lysine is a powerful weapon against cancers, liver disease, inflammation, and the viruses such as Epstein-Barr and shingles that are behind rheumatoid arthritis, joint pain, autoimmune disease, and more. Potatoes will be your allies if you’re looking to fight any chronic illness—to fend off liver disease, strengthen your kidneys, soothe your nerves and digestive tract, and reverse Crohn’s, colitis, IBS, or peptic ulcers.

In addition to being antiviral, they’re antifungal and antibacterial, with nutritional cofactors and coenzymes plus bioactive compounds to keep you healthy and assist you with stress. Further, potatoes are brain food that helps keep you grounded and centered. As a kid, did you ever do that science project where you stick some toothpicks in a potato, balance it in a cup of water, and watch it sprout on the windowsill? How many other foods can transform and thrive like that, coming to life before your eyes? That’s the power of a potato—a power that’s not to be underestimated—and we witness it firsthand as children. How does it happen that when we’re adults, we’re taught that it’s a weak, empty, ridiculous food, as though we’re supposed to forget the miracle we witnessed way back when? What we should really be saying about potatoes is, “Where would we be without you?” They are that vital to our existence.

Maybe you’ve steered clear of the potato misinformation all these years. If that’s the case, your body thanks you for it—and now you have even more reason to appreciate potatoes. On the other hand, if you’ve been led to believe that potatoes are nothing but starch that will add to your waistline, it’s time to see this root vegetable in a whole new light. If you’re bold enough to overcome the conditioning of popular food culture to appreciate the potato in its unadulterated form, you will give yourself one of the greatest gifts on this earth.”

Yes…safe to say on my healing journey I have definitely embraced the potato once again and I’m not sorry for it!

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Check out the recipe for chili loaded potatos right here

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This recipe is definitely a 10 out of 10 and something I will be adding into the weekly rotation as my husband enjoyed it as well.

Have a happy weekend everyone!

Medical Medium Recipe Challenge – October 8 – Liver Rescue Tea

O.K!! I think I am finally caught up. For my Medical Medium October Recipe Challenge Day 8 – I chose a relatively simple one because we have sorta been “go go go” since getting back from our mini get away.

SO I ended the day the best way that I know how….

A cuppa tea <3

A super healthful, nourishing, cleansing cuppa tea to be exact.

Yep….that would be the Medical Medium Liver Rescue Tea.

He said you can use dried herbs, loose leaf tea or tea bags and thankfully I had tea bags kicking around!

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Ingredients: Red Clover, Nettle, Dandelion and burdock root dried herbs, loose leaf tea or tea bags *** Note – I am missing the burdock root!

Red Clover: Red Clover is a wonderful herb that commonly grows in yards and meadows. The red flowers and green leaves are used as an herbal supplement due to their high concentration of minerals and healing benefits. Red Clover is known to soothe the nervous system, assist in balancing hormones, provide relief for bronchial problems, aid in healing infections, help improve fertility, cleanse the lymphatic system, and be a tonic for the digestive tract. Red clover can be used as a delicious tea which can be taken hot or cold with a touch of raw honey.

Nettle: According to the medical medium ” Nettle leaves are a powerful herbal medicine that grow abundantly in the wild. They are rich in chlorophyll and minerals such as iron, chromium, zinc, copper, magnesium, silicon, cobalt, and calcium. Nettles are also high in vitamins A, E, D, C, & K. Nettle tea is a strong immune booster and has the ability to neutralize toxic antigens in the body. 

Nettles also contain a potent anti-inflammatory agent which help to curb the action of cytokines, one of the key components to inflammation in the body. Nettle leaves are also very helpful in preventing chronic headaches, sore throats, sinus infections, and fatigue and are beneficial for diabetics as it is known to lower blood sugar levels. 

Nettles are known to help relief bronchial ailments such as chronic coughing, chest congestion, COPD, and TB. Nettles are also powerful enough to help to eliminate viral and bacterial infections and aid in removing excess fluids in the body by acting as a natural diuretic. Nettle leaf can provide relief for digestive issues such as nausea, flatulence, acid reflux, and colitis. 

Nettle tea supports the endocrine system including the spleen, thyroid, and pancreas. It is also beneficial in boosting liver and heart health and helps to prevent urinary tract infections as well as bladder and kidney stones. Nettle tea can also help stop frequent nighttime urination, which may be beneficial for those who need to sleep soundly without interruption. “

Dandelion: Detoxifies the liver and gallbladder

Burdock Root: Burdock root is a medicinal herb and food that has powerful anti-tumor, anti-fungal, anti-inflammatory, and anti-microbial properties. Burdock root is one of the top recommended herbal remedies for cancer due to the belief that it can stop cancer cells from metastasizing and it is one of the star ingredients of the famous natural cancer remedy known as Essiac tea. 

It is also highly beneficial for colds, flu, sore throats, bronchial congestion, ulcers, gallstones, anemia, kidney stones, chicken pox, gout, measles, strep throat, urinary tract infections, bladder infections, hepatitis, and enlarged prostates. Burdock root is an essential blood purifier and detoxifying herb as it can neutralize and safely eliminate poisons and toxins from the body. 

Burdock is one of the most important herbs for treating chronic skin problems such as acne, psoriasis, eczema, and shingles. It can also help to stimulate metabolism, re-grow hair, strengthen nails, and aid in edema and weight loss. Burdock root is an effective painkiller that can help alleviate symptoms of inflammation that affect auto-immune disorders such as rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, bursitis, lupus, and diabetes. 

I give this comforting tea a 7 out of 10. It has a earthy flavour but highly beneficial and cleansing to the body.